Obsessive Nature

As a child growing up my mother and father, probably unknowingly to both them and I, instilled in me a trait that I would carry with me for the rest of my life.  When I put my mind to ideas or understanding something I tend to get an insatiable appetite for the answer.  At work this is often beneficial to the company I work for.  It can also be confused for work ethic and is often referred to synonymously.

I can tell you from experience though, that while there is definitely an upside there is also a tremendous down side.  I tend to get obsessive. 

Recently, I read a book that ended up being about demon possession, so me in all of my infinite wisdom started contemplating whether demon possession is a thing of the past or something that I think still happens.  And that’s where it started. 

It only took me a day to pick up a book “Hostage to the Devil”, which was very interesting, and began my search for answers.  I came across a story in that book, all true from what I understand, where I saw a lot of myself in one of the priests.  Willingness to question things was part of who he was/is.  From that, I saw the effects of his studies on the people around him.  But that isn’t even the point of this blog, just a realization that I think God was showing me.   

I started to share what I was researching with my wife and she cautioned me about breaching the subject with my questioning.  I think her words were more like “you need to leave this one alone”.   My grandfather was reading my blog recently and sent me an email just a few days ago regarding an entirely different post saying “prayer and faith is the answer to it all and doubt helps us grow when we take it to the lord.  as the song goes, we will understand it better by and by so stick yo your bible. there is more wisdom than all the books”.  Since my Grandpa’s email came after I laid the issue down I saw this as confirmation that my wife was right about this one.

For a seeker like me I think they are both right, there are just certain things you do not broach, or invite into your life voluntarily, if there is reason or cause then it’s a different matter.  I can’t tell you what the internal struggle was like to put issue down before I had formed conclusions to about 10-15 questions I wanted answered.  It took me a day before I completely let the issue go.  In the end I know that outside of it all Christ said in Luke 10:20 “However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.”

My focus needs to be on God, and while we can often walk a very thin line it is wonderful to know that our God, the creator of the universe, is watching over us, slightly nudging me in the right direction to keep me on course.

I do believe that the battles we fight spiritually involve demons and I do believe that miracles still happen, I do believe that we are filled with the power and authority God has granted to us.  I do believe that the most powerful thing of all is that we are loved by the one who is and will always be, Him who is the beginning and the end, the creator of all things, and our Lord and our Savior Jesus Christ the Son of the Living God.

Amen, Hallelujah!